It's been a while since we've updated on the adoption front. 18 months ago when we began this journey, I had no idea what I was in for. Sure I had been to adoption classes, read blogs, etc..., but this experience has been much more difficult than I had thought. I was pretty vain and naive. I thought "we're good parents, someone will choose us fast I bet!". Hahahaha.
In the last year, we have had five different adoption situations. Three of them, the parents chose to place with another couple instead of us, and the other two the parents decided to parent (keep the baby), instead of placing the child with us. Each time this happened was a heart-wrenching experience. Enough so that after the last one I told Joseph that we were done, I couldn't handle the emotional turmoil anymore. Well after a few months to recover, we've decided to once again renew our homestudy and keep pushing forward. We feel strongly that there is a child(ren) out there for our family, whether it be through domestic adoption (what we're doing now), international adoption (which we don't qualify for yet, but soon will in the next couple year), or foster-to-adopt (which we are technically qualified to do, and our homestudy covers it, we just want our kids to be a little older before we pursue that route).
I have sure learned a lot about patience and trusting in the Lord during this experience. We're prepared in every way possible physically. We could get a call this morning and have a baby in ten minutes and we'd be good. It's the emotional side that's hard to deal with. So in the meantime please don't be offended if I skip your baby shower or decline to hang out because I simply don't have it in me to talking about your pregnancy or new baby right now. It's not you, it's me.
I want to thank all of our friends and family for their support! We have felt your love and encouragement. You all rock!
