Halloween 2014

Fall is one of my favorite times of year here in Cheyenne. The changing leaves and the weather are gorgeous.  There was surprisingly a lot to do in Cheyenne during Halloween time: pumpkin patches, fall carnivals, and parties on base.  I'm awful at taking pictures on a regular basis, but at least I got a few!

Hyrum was batman...

...and Lydia was Little Red Riding Hood

Our Hyrum Bug is One!

Our chunky monkey turned one this month!  Hyrum has been an incredible blessing to our family.  He is almost always happy.  He loves to cuddle, smile, play, and laugh.  Though his pregnancy was incredibly difficult, he has been worth it a million times over!

Some of Hyrum's favorite things are:

Playing peek-a-boo.
Hiding under the sink with his sister.

Swinging on the swing set for as long as we will let him.

Eating anything he can get his hands on.  This little boy is a great eater!

Walking around using his walker for support (he has yet to walk on his own).
Crawling super, super fast (this kid should enter a race.)
Cuddling in bed with his parents when he wakes up at 5am.

Emptying out the toy box.
Eating rocks at the park.
Being thrown up in the air by his daddy.

Watching "Toy Story" with his sister over and over and over again.

"Dancing" to music (he just bounces his body up and down)
Being passed back and forth from his mommy and daddy over and over again.
Feeding his parents his bottles.
Cuddling with soft animals.

We love you Hyrum!  We are so glad to have you in our family, and can't wait to see what you learn this next year!

Hyrum is Ten Months!

This little big guy is such a joy in our lives!  Seriously, I have never met a happier baby.  He is always smiling, and very rarely cries (and if he is crying it always involved either hunger or poop).  He is a big cuddler who will sit on your lap for hours.  He'll usually fall asleep there, too.  It's been good that he is so relaxed, because there will be about a dozen people who hold him each Sunday, especially the Sundays that Joseph is gone.  It sure helps me!  

Hyrum is crawling all over the place!  We've decided that he's taking longer to do physical things than Lydia did because he's so much bigger!  He and Lydia weigh almost exactly the same weight right now.  They wear the same size clothes, too! I've had to buy a size up almost every month.

Lydia is also crazy about her little brother.  She'll push him in the swing, or tickle his toes, or point out all his body parts (can you tell what we're learning right now?).  Sometimes they just sit by each other and laugh and laugh.  It does my heart good!  I'm glad we had them so close.  They'll be best friends!

Hyrum is six months!

Wow, I can't believe that it's already been six (ish) months since our chunky monkey was born!  So much has happened in that six months.  Our lives are totally different!  Hyrum is big for his age.  He and Lydia are only 2 pounds apart!  Because of that, he isn't able to crawl, or move at all really, without a lot of difficulty.  He wants to crawl so bad, we can tell, but he simply doesn't have the muscle yet to move himself.  He is incredibly chill.  He will just sit and observe for long periods of time.  If he's being held, he will rarely, if ever, cry.  He hates being left alone, though.  If he has attention, he is one happy boy.  We are so glad he came into our family!

And just because he's cute...

We love you, Hyrum!

Adoption in Wyoming is Different

            So we are on our way with the adoption process.  Adoption with LDS Family Services here in Wyoming is different though.  It turns out they don’t actually approve adoption in Wyoming since there wasn’t enough of a demand to warrant the licensing. (Only five couples in the last seven years have adopted from Wyoming.)  So we actually have to go through a different Catholic agency here in Cheyenne to get approved. Once we are, LDSFS will put our profile up on the LDSFS website, and we’ll also be on the Catholic agency website here in Cheyenne.  The good news is that we’ll have more exposure to potential birth parents since we’ll be on two websites, but unfortunately our adoption just got a whole lot more expensive.  Sigh But we felt again that this is what we are supposed to do, so we’re jus trying to save money in any way we can.  (It’s a good thing we bought our cruise and plane tickets for our vacation next month a long time ago.  It will be our last for a while, haha).  It’s also good because the Catholic agency doesn’t have an age limit on the children, so we are able to be approved as soon as we finish the paper work!  We don’t have to wait until Hyrum is one.  It’s a bit stressful, but exciting.  We are putting all our trust in the Lord!

            I want to get in the habit of updating more since potential birthparents will be hopefully checking out our blog.  I feel like I’m dating again.  We want our family to appear real, but show our best selves.  We want people to really get to know us so they can tell if we are a good fit or not.  It’s kind of a pressure situation being judged on our appearance, parenting skills, values, etc…  Someone out there has to like us!  If anyone has any suggestions for the blog, I’d love to hear it!  I’m planning on redoing the layout, etc… in the near future, but for now I will just keep posting about our family, even the mundane things.  Sometimes the littlest events are the most important. 

 In the meantime enjoy some pictures from my phone.

I heard Lydia crying in the other room when she was supposed to be taking a nap.  I go in to check on her and she had gotten her leg stuck in the bed.  Of course I take a picture before I save her!

Our chunky monkey turns 6 months this week!

They are big enough to both sit in the cart.  Stop growing so fast!

Hyrum Joseph Neary

 I was admitted to the hospital for the 6th and final time on September 27, at exactly 35 weeks.  The pattern was always the same.  I’d go to my appointment, have 4+ protein and really high blood pressures, they’d send me to the hospital, I’d be fine after 24 hours, then they’d send me home.  This time, however, my protein count had gone up to 6.5 grams (7 grams is complete kidney failure), and we were fast approaching the time when my body went to severe preeclampsia with Lydia.  Knowing my condition could change within hours, they decided to have me on full time monitoring at the hospital.  

Most of my day consisted of blood work, 24 hour urine labs, monitoring the baby constantly, getting steroids for his lungs, and trying to not die of boredom.  I felt like I was in a constant state of emergency.  Every morning it would be “well you’re getting worse, maybe we’ll deliver you tonight”. And every night it would be “well you’re getting worse, but we can push you off a day.  Maybe we’ll deliver you in the morning”.  It drove me crazy, but I was extremely grateful for every extra day that Hyrum was able to cook in there.

 Finally the morning of October 4th they decided to deliver me.  I had been on several blood pressure medications, which had been working great until the night before when my blood pressure was dangerously high despite the medication.  Also, my platelets were dropping.  They knew I’d go to severe preeclampsia within 24 hours, so we decided to deliver Hyrum that night at 36 weeks.  

Because of my last C-section experience, I was pretty fearful for what lay ahead, but a blessing and some calming techniques helped me get through all the needles and pain.  I walked into the OR, they numbed me up with a spinal block (which felt amazing my the way--100 million times better than an epidural).  Then they went to work getting little Hyrum out.  It actually took about 30 minutes to get him out because his head got stuck on my innards (that’s how the doctor described it).  They pushed and prodded for about 10 minutes before they finally got the vacuum and suctioned him out.  I didn’t even know a baby could get stuck in a c-section.  Hyrum Joseph Neary was born 5:32 pm on Friday, October 4th weighing 6 lbs 11 oz and measuring 19.5 inches.  I can’t imagine how big he would have been had he been full term.

 My recovering was nothing short of miraculous.  My blood pressure remained elevated for just a few hours after the delivery.  Last time it took about a week in the hospital for that to happen.  Hyrum suffered from low blood sugar and jaundice, and just barely managed to stay out of the NICU, but he pulled through as well!  The c-section experience was night and day compared to my last one.  I was up and walking within 12 hours, I’ve felt fabulous physically and emotionally, and now just a week later I am able to do things that took me about a month to do before.  The lord sure has blessed us!  

Hyrum is a very low-maintenance baby.  Because he is a preemie, he sleeps most of the day, and only wakes up to eat.  I’ve been able to get great sleep, only waking up every three hours to feed him for 30 minutes, and it’s allowed me to give Lydia lots of attention as well so she doesn’t feel quite to jealous.  Actually, she loves Hyrum.  She smiles and laughs whenever she holds him, and most of the time she doesn’t try to poke his eyes out.  He looks 100% like his father, and almost nothing like his sister.  You can barely even tell they are siblings.

 Overall life is really good right now.  The after baby hormones never really came.  I’ve been really happy and emotionally sane.  I hope it lasts!  I want to thank everyone who has helped us these last few weeks whether it be through babysitting, meals, gifts for Hyrum, visiting, or anything else.  Know that it has been appreciated!  I love being a mom of two and have felt more love this last week than I though possible in my little heart.  

Week 34 Update

Thursday afternoon brought another doctors appointment (like I’ve been having 2-3 times a week).  It was a routine non-stress test and check up.  Truthfully it was the first doctor’s appointment in a while that I was going to not feeling completely icky and sick, so I was positive everything was fine.  I go in, they take my blood pressure, 140/90.  I wasn’t worried because it had been that high many times before.  

During the non-stress test they come to inform me that my protein level was at 4+.  For those who don’t know what that means, it’s bad.  I had been at 2+ for most of this pregnancy, which is already well into the danger zone.  To have that double meant my body was not doing well.  I was sent over to the perinatologist next door to run a few tests, and my blood pressure was at 150/100, high enough to be concerned.  After checking out some things, they decided to send me to the hospital on a blood pressure medication and to do a 24 hour urine sample all while they were watching me to make sure I didn’t go into full pre-eclampsia mode.  If I had been past 36 weeks they would have delivered me then and there, but since the baby still has a lot of growing to do, they were hoping to keep me at bay for a few more weeks.  

Well miracle of miracles, everything worked exactly as it should, and I had low blood pressures for 24 hours straight along with okay labs (okay enough that I didn’t need to be monitored at the hospital anymore.)  The blood work continues to get steadily worse, so they still are doing labs every 1-2 days.  My protein levels have gone way up, but my kidneys haven’t failed completely and protein level alone is not enough to hospitalize me.  For now I’m on super strict bed rest at home (I literally can only leave the bed to go to the bathroom and the occasional short shower).  And I have to go in to the hospital again tomorrow to get yet more blood work done and some blood pressure monitoring.  Hopefully it is just short term.  

 I am way more than ready for this pregnancy to be over.  If it weren’t for the fact that I love my son much more than lots of needles, hospitals, and three months of bedrest, I would have begged them to deliver me yesterday.  I am incredibly grateful that we have made it this far, and I know each day I make it is days less in the NICU for Hyrum.  On the plus side, I have almost complete conquered my phobia of needles.  Only 2-3 more weeks to go!  Though honestly I’m extremely skeptical that I will make it another week the way things are going.  Any bets on when he’ll make his debut?  It’s between now and October 11th at the latest.

What would it be like to have a normal pregnancy?

Well we’re at 33 weeks, another milestone I didn’t think I’d make it to.  On Monday things started going bad again where my blood pressure shot up and I was having all the preeclampsia symptoms (headaches, nausea, swelling, etc…)  I had gained over a pound a day in between then and my last appointment—all fluid.  I went into the doctor and they ran a lot of labs again, but they all came back normal which doesn’t make any sense, but who can argue with blood?  My protein level in my urine has gone up to 1.2 grams, but they won’t deliver me on high protein alone until I’m above 5 grams, which is complete kidney failure.  

I was sent home on very strict bed rest and some more labs to do at home.  The next day I went in and I had lost 5 lbs overnight and my blood pressure had returned to normal for me.  Basically the prognosis was that modified bed rest was not working, but apparently strict bed rest was.  The doctor gave me an ultimatum.  I could go home on strict bed rest (only allowed to get up to go to the bathroom), or she would check me in to the hospital right then and force me to.  I obviously chose staying at home.  I hate hospitals.  

The problem is that I have a one year old at home who needs a lot more attention than a mom on strict bed rest can give, and my son needs the attention of a mom who doesn’t put his life in danger by getting out of bed.  We made the difficult decision to send Lydia to my mom’s house in Utah for a few weeks.  My mom is the other person in the world she is most familiar with, I want her to have a normal schedule and not be at a different stranger’s house every day, and I trust my mom more than just about anyone to make good decisions for my daughter if something should come up.  Lydia would be able to have the attention she needs and the love of my siblings.  It was just best for her.   She and my mom left this morning and I’m trying to stay positive (*sniff*).  In other news it’s national positive thinking day.  How appropriate.

 Right now the goal is 36 weeks, so I’m looking at another three weeks at least in bed.  The headaches and nausea are still very much present, so I feel very sick a lot of the time.  Luckily I can just sleep it off most of the day.  Besides that I’m just lonely.  Joseph’s been working 12 hour days, so I’m alone all day.  So far I’m through six of the nine books in the Work in the Glory series (highly recommend!), and on level 215 of candy crush (I’m actually ashamed to admit that one).  If absolutely anyone wants to come and visit, please do not hesitate.  A thirty minute conversation lifts my spirits so much.  The same invitation goes for skype dates.  I have a lot of time on my hands.

 I’m afraid I’m still a bit in the “woe is me” stage of this, but give it a day or two and I’ll be in the “come what may in love it” stage.   Only 21 days to go!  I keep remembering that his is all for my son who I love more than anything!  And truthfully the bed rest is working.  I went to my appointment yesterday and my blood pressure was at 120/80!  I haven’t been that low in months!  And I had lost another couple of pounds of fluid, haha.  If only I could do that after the pregnancy, right?  

Lydia's birthday and a pregnancy update

I’m blogging from my phone again, so all the pictures are at the bottom of the post.  Sorry!   

Lydia’s first birthday was pretty laid back.  With me on bed rest and Joseph in intense training, we didn’t have a huge party.  We mostly made the day all about Lydia: we opened presents (all clothes), went out to lunch at McDonalds, and then had a few friends over while Lydia dug into her birthday cake.  It was just a simple family day.  

Now for a pregnancy update:  We’ve made it to 32 weeks!  A month ago when I was first put on bed rest, I never thought I would make it this far, but here we are!  Every time I go to my doctor, she’s amazed I’ve made it this far too.  She thinks I’m just lucky, but we all know better.  It’s all the prayers and fasting on Hyrum and my’s behalf.  The doctor’s decided that the latest they will let me carry Hyrum is 37 weeks.  At that point she feels it is safer and healthier to have him out of me rather than in me because of the strain I’m putting on his development.  October 11th is our scheduled C-section.  

 I really wanted to go VBAC, but the nearest hospital with the required capabilities is over an hour away and it would put a lot of unnecessary health risks on Hyrum right now, so we opted for a repeat C-section.  I love the fact that I can plan and prepare for his arrival, but I really am not looking forward to all the pain.  My OB assures me that a scheduled C-section is a different experience entirely than the emergency C-section after 24 hours of labor I had with Lydia.  Is anyone else able to vouch for her claims?  I’ll just have to see for myself.  
I’m still on bed rest for now, because apparently it’s working.  My doctor still thinks I won’t make it until October, but that’s our goal for now.  That does mean another five weeks on bed rest (no fun!), but it means no NICU for Hyrum!  I’ll take that over being lonely and bored at home any day.  

If anyone in California is ever wanting to, feel free to come and visit us!  We don’t get out often and I would love to have some adult interaction (as much as I love talking to Lydia all day).  Thanks again to everyone’s faith, prayers, and service on our behalf.  We know that is why Hyrum and doing so well, and we couldn’t be more appreciative!

Complicated Complicated

     I finally went to the OB here in California after not seeing one for 9 or 10 weeks with our lapse in insurance and the move and everything.  At my first appointment the protein level in my urine sample came back too high (a 2+ if anyone cares to know).  So they sent me in for some labs and tests to see what was up.  Now with Lydia I measured at a 2+, then did the labs, then I delivered the next day with severe preeclampsia.  So obviously I was freaking out since I was only 27 weeks at the time.  After a 24 hour urine lab, my protein count came back at 900mg.  Anything above a 300 is the preeclampsia zone, so I’m very much at risk, but it’s still nowhere near the 5000mg I was at with Lydia when I delivered.  Basically at this point we are just waiting for the rest of the preeclampsia symptoms to show up before they deliver me (mostly waiting for my blood pressure to rise dramatically).  It’s a bit scary knowing that my baby could be delivered any day (I’m at 28 weeks now), and I don’t have any control over it.  There is a small chance that it could never show up, and I make it full term.  It would take a miracle, but miracles happen!  For now my OB would be thrilled if I made it to 34 weeks (I would be too!).
      Right now I’m on bed rest to try to keep the rest of the symptoms from coming up.  It’s a modified bed rest thankfully so I can still take care of Lydia meaning I can feed her, change her, and bathe her, but that’s pretty much all I’m allowed to do. We did have one scare last Friday where my blood pressure went up too high and I got sent to the hospital for some tests and such, but luckily during the hours I was there it went back down and the tests came back looking awesome (no kidney failure yet!), so I am in the clear for now.  It’s really unnerving to have to be prepared and packed to have little Hyrum delivered anytime from tomorrow to 12 weeks from now.
     We have been incredibly blessed to have such help.  Our families are praying for us, which we can feel the blessings of already.  Ward members have babysat and brought over meals.  Best of all the Air Force has given Joseph permission to go on extended medical leave if something very serious comes up.  That’s a huge relief right there.   
     Probably the hardest part for me is that if the preeclampsia does show up, this will most likely be our last biological child.  The chance of preeclampsia in a third pregnancy after these two is nearly 100% and the chance of it showing up much early and more severe, resulting in fetal or my death, is about 50%.  Those statistics are way too high to even mess with.  For a couple who wanted 6-8 kids, this news had been devastating, but I’m always hopeful that something will happen that could allow to us to bring more children into our family somehow.  
       The person who has been most amazing is my dear Joseph.  He’s balancing training, being young men’s president, and now doing everything I used to do like cooking and cleaning.  The poor guy is always moving, getting things done, and doesn’t have a moment to himself.  But he’s taken it really well, and is willing to do anything to keep this baby healthy.  I could not have done any of this without him.
     In other news Lydia turns one in less than three weeks!  Wow time has flown!  She probably will just get a cake for her birthday since neither Joseph nor I are in any condition to plan a party, but luckily she’s one and couldn’t care less. She took her first steps last week and is very close to walking. She brings us so much joy and we love her to pieces!
     Overall we have been really blessed, and ask you all to keep Hyrum in your prayers.  We want him to last at least a few more weeks!

Neary Baby #2

Yes we've already announced this to everyone, but I want it in the history books blog since facebook does not have a print option.

We are having another baby!

Doesn't Lydia look so excited about it?

Nah, she's just excited about eating the chalkboard

I know some of you are wondering; they will be 14 months apart.  They will be each other's best friends!  We find out the gender in two weeks.  Yay!

This pregnancy has gone a lot better than the last one.  It might just be because I know what to expect and am able to better deal with being sick/tired.  Maybe it's because I have taken 1-2 naps a day since we graduated. (That's when I'm especially grateful that Lydia takes three solid one-hour naps. Then I can sleep too.)  We're thrilled to be parents again, and can't wait to meet this little one in November!